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(this review was originally written February 27, 2023)
Today I am reviewing a real whopper from the greatest heights of profound artistic vision: Lord of Chaos • Varg Vikernes attacks the movie (2019), written and directed by Varg Vikernes, and heroically distributed by "Enderdragon" after the original copies were taken down. This is what real auteur art looks like. Let's hear what ol' Varg has to say.
Now, like any masterpiece, truly appreciating this film requires understanding its context. So, to sum up: in the mid-80s a Norweigan guy going by the pseudonym 'Euronymous' formed a death metal band called Mayhem. The original lead singer killed himself; Euronymous hired Varg Vikernes aka Burzum (another death metal artist) as a bassist; the group burned down a bunch of churches; there were some tensions about money; Varg stabbed Euronymous to death and went to prison for 15 years. In 1998, someone turned the story into a book called Lords of Chaos, and the book was adapted into a movie in 2018.
One year after that, a recording of Varg's response to the movie was posted on YouTube. Then, after another few years, I heard about the movie, thought it sounded neat, and made a note of it. I watched it, (LORDS OF CHAOS REVIEW: pretty much just a macabre Spinal Tap), and then learned from the internet it was rather inaccurate in several ways. Luckily, I have someone who was there at the time to set the story straight.
The most striking inaccuracy of Lords of Chaos is that it invents a fictional girlfriend for Euronymous, who had none in real life. I agree with Varg that this is a pretty important thing to get wrong, especially since (in his words) Euronymous was actually closeted gay, and everyone knew it. The movie also got wrong that (checks notes) Euronymous was actually a terrible salesman, everyone else in the band was a rat who sold each other out, Varg never talked to the police, they never had anything proving he burned down those churches, and he is NOT a vegetarian. (A caption helpfully adds that he tried carnivore "for some time", but gave up "after a week".)
Now, as Varg notes, Lords of Chaos opens with a disclaimer that it is based on "truth and lies", so it's not surprising that they stretch the facts a bit. Let's give the movie a fair shake and ask what thematic purpose some of these fictionalizations might serve. For example, the scene where Varg talks to the press, accidentally giving away his identity, appears to be made-up. Varg thinks this is done purely to slander him, but I think there may be some meaning to the scene. The critical line comes when the journalist, looking around his room, notes how "broad" it is that his belief system includes being a paganist, a Satanist, and a Nazi. Now, Varg doesn't directly comment on this characterization, but he does advertise his books on Paganism Explained, available now from burzum.com; he further expresses distaste for black metal artists that aren't "really" Satanic; and finally, a bitter amusement that despite his outspoken political views, the actor chosen to play him was none other than... Emory COHEN. Is it possible the fictional journalist had a point?
One reason he might not be able to respond to that part directly is that he hasn't actually seen the movie for himself. He fully admits this - he's practically bragging about it. This leads to an interesting thematic resonance. Lords of Chaos is fundamentally a movie about truth vs. image; Euronymous is a normal-ish guy wants to be seen as an evil satanist, Varg actually is one and doesn't care what other people think, and the conflict grows from there. In the last line of the movie, Euronymous callis you a poser for sitting at home, watching him rather than going out and doing black-metal type things yourself. On another level, Varg is calling the creators of the film posers, for turning his story into Hollywood schlock without interviewing anyone involved or trying to get their facts straight. But then on another level, Varg himself is a poseur for dissing the film without actually watching it. However, only I, sitting atop my golden throne at the peak of Hipster Mountain, can claim the ultimate crown of poserdom, because I wrote all this and I don't even like death metal.
Maybe this isn't the most serious review, but I actually do think there is something to be learned from Varg's videos. I'm thinking about the "banality of evil" idea, coined in reference to Bob Eichmann, a man best known for his participation in some trivial historical event or other. As I watched Varg, murderer and church-arsonist, try to make himself look cooler than Hollywood in a series of poorly-edited YouTube videos, I viscerally felt the banality of evil. In Lords of Chaos, fiction-Varg claims he's more "real" than Euronymous because he was out burning churches while his bandmate was spouting off. Maybe he's right. But you know what's really real? This man hated someone enough to stab them to death THIRTY YEARS AGO, and he's STILL bitter enough about it to play stupid dick-measuring games against him in front of the entire internet!
Varg, come on. Euronymous doesn't care if you call him a homosexual or insult his business prowess. Euronymous is dead. YOU KILLED HIM! This is a man who does not demonstrate a single ounce of remorse for any of the violent crimes committed by him or the people around him, but he is butthurt enough about being ratted out to give his former bandmates silly high-pitched voices while he makes fun of them for his YouTube channel. And yeah, it is weird that someone would turn this real, living person into a cartoon villain for their schlocky horror movie when he doesn't want them to. But if anything, Lords of Chaos gives him too MUCH credit, by portraying him as someone Serious and Brooding. I think your Serious Brooding Satanist pass gets pretty much thrown out the window when you complain about being misrepresented for listening to the wrong bands! Varg is like a school shooter in a Shadow the Hedgehog hoodie. It's unnerving to watch a real person so evil act so pathetically petty.
4/10